My Paxil Story
They’ve have just finished having some late night loving- it
was pretty hot despite the fact that she still has her orange
Syracuse sweatpants halfway on and he wears only his black socks and a thin layer of night sweat.
He lies on top of her- still inside. She pushes up his shoulders placing them face-to-face. His forehead radiates from the computer screen like lime green Jell-O.
This big forehead she pretends to hate. Another meaningless physical piece of this person. She mocks and mocks around the others.
Her thin ears, pudgy stomach, hairy lip, big nipples: HE never says a word. Does he see it? How does he not see it all?
She hates this part. Him still inside. Like cracking an egg and holding the shell in your hand for the rest of the day.
Jane: God the Paxil really suppressed my sex drive
This statement forces him to throw away the egg shell and get off her.
Dick: really?!
Jane: yeah ,why… what?
Dick: nothing
Jane: What?
Dick: No, nothing.
Jane: Stop, just tell me.
Dick: I dunno, I can just tell- I mean since we’ve been back together- since you’ve been on the Paxil – you never want to do it- you just seem a little…bored.
Jane: That’s not true!
Beat. A couple of beats pass.
Jane: If by bored you mean not wanting to suck your dick in the thirteen minutes in the morning I have to get from the bed to my office then yes babe you’re right- absolutely genius.
Dick: Here we go again…
She looks away from him- fuck him for expecting it.
This pill which has reduced her glass house in to crumbled Ceran wrap.
Dick: Baby c’mon…..what?
Jane: nothing, get off me
She moves back and forth using all her strength to move the lanky yet surprisingly strong frame above her.
Jane: just get off me, move!
She runs out the door into the black night. Tears chuck out of her cheeks hard and uneven. She feels for anything and everything- something to get her to the bathroom.
He has stopped coming after her.
Just as the snot begins to gather at the base of her nose, Jane finds herself on the beige carpet beside the snoring roommate -Nina Simone-ish record plays- cats fur everywhere- she wants to lay down in the middle of this warm room full of vintage day coats, hemp candles, and sober sleep.
She sits on the toilet trying to pee. Squeeze Squeeze but nothing
comes out just more tears. Tears. And a mixture of him inside her.
Silence takes her to her side of the bed.
Dick: Are you serious? Babe…
Jane: Just don’t- I can’t
Come here Will Smith- jump off the screen and save this bloodbath.
He reaches out to her- she almost falls off the bed trying to reach away.
Dick: So you’re mad at me for stating something that is technically a compliment because you’re going off the Paxil now.. Jesus, it’s like you are trying so hard to be mad at me. You’re being such a baby!
More tears -she’s wasted so many on him this past week- he gets the point- it’s not her fault. She wants to waste these empty tears on someone else- like a casting director.
Everything could be so right if they wanted it enough to get through the wrong.
Storyboard by : Brittany Synott Johnston
http://brittanysynottjohnston.com